The laughing policeman   

It happened down at Goodison, not so long ago;
The Everton fans were singing, Howard Kendall he must go;
But then he won a trophy, and he was Everton's pride;
You two-faced Everton ******, you're the s**t on Merseyside!!!
Ohhh, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha...

There was a local manager, not so long ago;
The Everton fans were singing, Colin Harvey he must go;
And then they lost at Bramall Lane, so they gave the ** the sack;
But six days later, and they brought the ***** back!!!
Ohhh, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha...

There was a local derby, not so long ago;
The Everton fans were singing, the songs that they all know;
Then Dalglish scored a brilliant goal, but they said it was offside;
But we don't give a s**t because we scored ***** five!!!
Ohhh, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha...

and then they won a trophy and things were looking bright
30,000 Evertonians appeared overnight
but wait until the bubble bursts you know were they will be
right back down in the sewers were they were in 83'
Ohhh, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha...